Willingness: A Superpower for Life

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What is willingness?

At its simplest, willingness is a readiness to act. It is the quality of being prepared to do something, to lean in rather than hold back. That readiness is the spark that moves ideas into motion and keeps us learning when things get uncomfortable. Cambridge Dictionary

The pattern I see in coaching

After coaching people through many seasons of change, a pattern shows up. The people who move the needle share a foundational trait: they are willing. They are willing to admit they do not know everything, willing to ask questions, willing to try, willing to practice. That willingness unlocks awareness, and awareness fuels resilience and continuous improvement. Without willingness, the rest stalls.

Research echoes this. A growth mindset reframes failures as information and makes us more likely to take on hard things and learn from them. That stance begins with a willingness to believe you can develop and to test that belief in practice. Center for Teaching and Learning

In therapy and well-being science, willingness also means opening up to your internal experience and still choosing valued action. You do not have to like every feeling to move forward; you choose to act anyway. That is a powerful reframe when change feels messy.

What people see versus what they miss

When a big goal is reached — a new role, a new home, an award — the world sees the outcome. What it does not see are the choices, tradeoffs, micro-habits, and reps that stacked up behind the scenes. Expertise in any field is built on deliberate practice: focused repetitions with feedback that gradually make complex skills feel natural. None of that happens without the willingness to show up and keep refining. iSchool Blogs

Willingness looks different at every level

  • Financial progress: A willing mindset faces the numbers, sits with the discomfort, and asks what is possible now. Maybe that means a smaller place for a while, sharing costs, or a season of simple meals while debt drops. Willingness trades some “now” for more “later.”
  • Career growth: Willingness narrows your focus to a few specific outcomes. You design reps that matter — shadow a meeting each week, submit one stretch proposal, take a course and apply one idea the same month.
  • Personal resilience: Willingness lets emotions move through, not run the show. You feel the feeling and still take the next right step aligned with your values.

A simple framework: from willing to winning

  1. Name your why. What value or outcome are you moving toward?
  2. Pick one skill. Keep it specific and observable.
  3. Design tiny reps. Ten minutes a day counts.
  4. Get feedback fast. Ask a mentor or use a simple metric.
  5. Adjust one thing. Small changes, often.
  6. Reflect weekly. What worked, what did not, and what is the next rep?

This is the loop behind real improvement. It mirrors how experts train: focused goals, near-term feedback, and a lot of purposeful repetition. iSchool Blogs

Try this today

  • Write one place you are willing to be a beginner again.
  • Set one micro-commitment for the next five days.
  • Ask one trusted person for a single piece of feedback you can use this week.
  • Capture one lesson you learned and the next rep you will take.

Final thought

Willingness is not about perfection. It is about readiness. It is the decision to learn in public, to practice before you feel prepared, and to keep moving one honest step at a time. That decision strengthens your superpower with every goal you reach, every lesson you earn, and every door you open for the next season of your life.

How our teams compare to drivers on the highway

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As I was returning from a volleyball tournament I watched how 1 car caused a 9 car pile up, and then as I sat in a shut down highway closer to home, my mind started to compare how the different types of drivers on the road compare to the types of people on our teams…

The workplace is a highway

If you have ever watched traffic long enough, you have seen your team. The steady cruisers. The defensive drivers who anticipate trouble and keep everyone safe. The chaos creators who cut across lanes without signals and then blame others for the pileup. Work is no different. Culture lives in how people “drive” together.

Here is the simple map.

A Team: the defensive drivers

These are the accountable hard workers who show up even when conditions get tough. They plan routes, read turn signals, keep safe following distance, and adjust speed to avoid trouble. They find ways around obstacles and protect the whole lane. In the office this looks like proactive communication, early risk calls, clean handoffs, and a habit of solving problems instead of creating them.

What they need from leaders: clear destinations, freedom to course-correct, and quick access to road condition updates.

B Team: the steady cruisers

These folks show up and do the job. They keep to their lane, rarely cause problems, and rarely prevent them either. Because they are not proactive, they are the most likely to get caught in the mess when the C Team triggers an incident.

What they need from leaders: simple playbooks, regular check-ins, and small, specific ways to be more anticipatory. Think “here is how to use your mirrors” rather than “be more strategic.”

C Team: the chaos creators

These are the drivers who believe they are right and know exactly what they are doing, but they skip signals and ignore mirrors. They swerve, brake late, and blame everyone when things go wrong. At work this looks like low awareness, low transparency, surprise changes, and finger pointing.

What they need from leaders: firm road rules, very clear consequences, coaching on awareness and communication, and a visible model of Above the Line behavior. If they refuse to adapt, they need the exit ramp.

Translate the road rules to team rules

  • Turn signals = transparency. Declare changes early. Share intent before action.
  • Mirrors = feedback loops. Use retros, 1:1s, and quick pulse checks to see blind spots.
  • Lanes = roles. Define ownership, RACI, and decision rights so people know where to drive.
  • Speed limits = capacity. Set WIP limits and realistic timelines so quality can keep up with pace.
  • Following distance = buffers. Respect SLAs and handoff windows to avoid pileups.
  • Hazard lights = escalation paths. Make it safe to call a stop when something is unsafe.
  • GPS = goals and OKRs. Shared destinations reduce random lane changes.

Driving school: the crash course in expectations

You can move the needle for the whole fleet. Here is a simple syllabus.

  1. Orientation: the rule book
    Publish team norms in plain language. Ownership, communication, decision rules, definition of done.
  2. Signal training: transparency in practice
    Teach “state the intent, state the change, state the impact.” Use Slack templates or brief standup scripts.
  3. Mirror checks: feedback rhythm
    Short, frequent retros. Manager 1:1s that ask two questions: what helped, what hindered.
  4. Simulator drills: rehearse the hard stuff
    Tabletop incident walk-throughs, role-play of escalations, checklists for go-lives.
  5. Ride-alongs: mentoring and shadowing
    Pair an A driver with a B driver for a sprint. Swap roles for a meeting and debrief the differences.
  6. Tune-ups: quarterly health checks
    Review norms, metrics, and team load. Identify one behavior to elevate from C to B and one from B to A.
  7. License renewal: accountability
    Celebrate visible Above the Line behavior. Address Below the Line patterns fast and fairly.

Progress over perfection applies here. Even small shifts change traffic flow fast.

Make it practical: a quick team self-assessment

Ask your team to score 1 to 5 on each item.

  • We signal changes before we make them.
  • We know who owns what and who decides what.
  • We call risks early and adjust the route together.
  • We run short retros that actually change behavior.
  • We keep pace realistic so quality stays high.
  • We escalate clearly when things are unsafe.

Low scores show you exactly where to teach a driving skill next.

Leadership outcomes when everyone drives better

  • Alignment improves. More people driving the bus in the same direction.
  • Noise drops. You can see true issues instead of confusion caused by missing signals.
  • Momentum builds. A and B drivers spend less time dodging chaos and more time delivering value.
  • Choice becomes clear. With expectations visible, people either get on board or take the exit ramp.

Personal note: joy and resilience behind the wheel

High performance is not just traffic management. It is human. Protect space for joy, recovery, and learning. A rested, aware driver makes better decisions and keeps the whole road safer. That is how culture moves from Below the Line blame to Above the Line ownership.

Reflection prompts for leaders

  • What percentage of your team sits in A, B, and C right now?
  • Which single rule, if clarified this week, would remove the most lane changes?
  • Who needs signal training, and who can mentor as a ride-along?

Start there. Move one behavior from C to B. Move one behavior from B to A. Keep going. That is how you change the way the whole highway looks & feels.

Practice Over Pretend: How Trying New Things Turns Failure Into Fuel

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Why failure and firsts belong together

We love phrases like “fake it till you make it” or “be brave enough to try.” Underneath both is the same truth. Growth requires stretching your mind. The more you try, the more familiar problem solving becomes. Not every problem gets easier, but you get stronger. Like studying a subject deeply, repeated exposure builds the wiring that helps you handle complexity with more calm.

When I coach clients or mentees, I remind them that progress is not magic. It is intentional activity. It is practice. Reps create readiness. Readiness creates confidence.

Practice makes it natural, not perfect

Think about medical interns and residents. Those first years can look brutal from the outside. Long hours, constant quizzing, tough feedback. It is not torture for torture’s sake. It is structured practice with safety nets. Trainees are pushed through real scenarios while experienced people watch closely, catch mistakes, and help them correct in the moment.

That kind of practice does two important things:

  1. It turns essential actions into second nature.
  2. It builds the ability to perform under stress.

You do not need to be in medicine to use the same idea. If you practice the hard parts on purpose, you reduce the chance of freezing when the stakes go up.

Intentional reps beat “fake it” every time

“Fake it till you make it” can nudge you to start, but it will not carry you through complexity. Deliberate practice will. Try this simple loop:

  1. Define the skill you want to grow. Keep it specific.
  2. Set micro-reps you can do often. Ten minutes counts.
  3. Get feedback from someone you trust or measure your own output.
  4. Adjust one thing on the next rep. Keep the loop tight.
  5. Repeat on a schedule you can maintain.

Consistency turns effort into ease. Ease frees up attention for creativity. That is how people begin to look “naturally talented.” Most of the time, it is reps.

What to practice when life is busy

  • At work:
    • Shadow someone for a single meeting and note two behaviors to try next time.
    • Take one webinar each month and apply one idea the same week.
    • Build a five-slide “practice deck” to explain your project to a non-expert, then time yourself.
  • For leadership:
    • Before a tough conversation, write your opening and your first question. Practice aloud three times.
    • After each 1:1, jot one sentence about what you learned and one sentence you will use next time.
  • For personal growth:
    • Do a five-minute “micro-courage” action each day. Send the email. Ask the question. Try the new drill.
    • Keep a tiny log: Attempt, Outcome, Lesson, Next Rep. Four lines, done.

Make room for healthy failure

Failure is not proof that you cannot do it. It is information. Treat misses like a coach would.

  • What happened: describe the action, not your worth.
  • What it means: identify one skill gap or one decision you would change.
  • What you will try next: name the next rep and when you will do it.

Progress over perfection wins every time. Small, honest adjustments compound.

When it counts, your practice shows up

Under pressure we do not rise to the occasion. We fall to the level of our training, then climb from there. If you want calm execution when the room is hot, build it when the room is quiet. Reps now are confidence later.

So ask yourself today: What tiny skill, if practiced for ten minutes a day, would change the way you show up a month from now? Start there. Keep going. Let practice make it natural.

The Spark Within: Finding Joy in the Journey

“When was the last time you felt pure joy?”

It’s a question that recently rippled through my network, and it stopped me in my tracks. Not because I didn’t have an answer, but because of how rarely we ask ourselves that simple, yet powerful, question. We often chase progress, promotions, or productivity — but joy? Joy often becomes an afterthought.

Yet when we look back on the moments that define our lives — the ones that light us up — it’s joy that creates the spark.

Joy Is More Than a Feeling — It’s Fuel

I had the opportunity to meet Rich Sheridan, CEO of Menlo Innovations, after his talk at Southern Fried Agile. Rich built his company around one radical idea: Joy. His book Joy, Inc. lays out a human-centered approach to leadership and work, where team pride, purpose, and joy aren’t just buzzwords — they’re baked into the culture.

The room was electric as Rich spoke, not because he had some magic formula, but because you could feel how deeply connected he was to his team and their mission. He wasn’t speaking about Agile as a methodology — he was speaking about people. That’s the kind of transformation leaders dream of, but often miss because they’re looking for quick fixes instead of building from within.

The Joy/Work Connection

At work — just like in life — joy isn’t fluff. It’s the foundation.

When we focus on joy, it doesn’t mean we ignore hardship. We embrace it with joy. We find joy in collaboration, in solving hard problems, in helping others succeed. That spark fuels the effort. It doesn’t replace the grind, but it reminds us why we keep showing up.

And here’s the truth: If we don’t make room for joy, burnout isn’t a possibility — it’s a guarantee.

Just like Rich’s team, we have to create intentional space for it. Not because it’s easy, but because it’s essential.

Joy in Life: Intentional Moments That Matter

Joy doesn’t only live in the big things. Sometimes it’s found in:

  • Laughing uncontrollably with friends on a random Tuesday
  • A spontaneous girls’ night that leads to meaningful new ideas
  • Paddling on the lake at sunset
  • Spiking a volleyball on a cool autumn morning

Those small moments? They stack up. They become the resilience bank we draw from when life gets hard. They keep us anchored to what matters.

Leadership, Purpose, and Joy

In personal coaching and professional growth, I often ask clients: What lights you up?

Because when life gets hard — and it will — our ability to sustain success and stay resilient doesn’t come from ego or external validation. It comes from what we believe in.

In my career, I’ve had moments with difficult leaders. Times I wanted to quit. What kept me grounded wasn’t the paycheck. It was remembering that I don’t work for a toxic leader — I work for the mission. I help make it easier and safer for people to use their money. That truth brings the purpose back into focus, and joy back into the work.

Try This: Recall Your Joy

Take a moment today. Think back to your childhood. What’s one memory of pure joy?

What do you feel when you remember it? Lightness? Laughter? Wonder?

Let that guide you.

You don’t need to live in the past, but you can use it as a compass. The joy you once felt isn’t gone — it’s just waiting to be invited back in.

Final Thought

Don’t let the fast pace of life bury your joy. Build it in. Be intentional. Make space.

Let joy fuel your mission, your passion, and your purpose — because when joy leads, the journey becomes one worth taking.

Continuous Improvement: Maintaining Relevance in an Evolving World

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In a world where change is constant and innovation never pauses, one truth remains: we must adapt, or risk becoming irrelevant.

At work, in life, and in the coaching sessions I lead, this is a core message I share. You don’t need to be an expert in every late-breaking trend, but remaining aware, curious, and open to learning keeps you agile. The goal isn’t mastery of all things—it’s the mindset of growth that matters.

Why Relevance Matters

“If you dislike change, you’re going to dislike irrelevance even more.”
— General Eric Shinseki, U.S. Army Chief of Staff, 1999

Shinseki’s words, a powerful twist on Bernard Kelvin Clive’s insight — “If you don’t stay relevant, you will be relegated” — still ring true decades later. Spoken during a time when the world started to shift under the weight of technology—dial-up internet and cell phones were transforming into broadband/DSL and smaller smarter devices. Who had a blackberry?

Fast forward over two decades, and what was once cutting-edge is now a relic of the past. The sound of a dial-up modem is now a punchline, and AI is the new game-changer. For those who resist change, it might not be “do or die,” but it could cost long-term income, career opportunities, and fulfillment.

Resilience and Relevance

In my resilience series, we talked about how our ability to adapt is a key part of growth. Resilience isn’t just about enduring hardship—it’s about remaining open and relevant in the face of evolving circumstances.

Sometimes I remind people who are more structured in their thinking: sure, you can still do things the “old-fashioned way,” but that will likely take you longer—and time is a more valuable currency than money. Money can be earned again; time, we never get back.

This doesn’t mean we chase every new trend, but it does mean we remain active participants in our own development.

What Does Maintaining Relevance Actually Look Like?

Whether professionally or personally, staying relevant comes down to small, intentional actions:

In Your Career:

  • Webinars and Online Courses: Take time to learn about industry trends or new technologies. Even a single article can shift your thinking.
  • Conferences and Events: Attend networking events or listen to speakers on emerging topics, even outside your field.
  • Cross-functional Curiosity: Ask how another team works. Learn what tools or methods they use. Understanding their perspective can elevate yours.

In Your Personal Life:

  • Read or Listen: Books, podcasts, and articles can feed your awareness and expand your perspective.
  • Engage in Hobbies or Interests: I’ve mentioned my love for volleyball and paddleboarding before. Through these, I’ve had conversations that sparked ideas for travel, finances, and more.
  • Stay Social: Three girls’ nights in one weekend recently gave me more insight than some professional workshops. Never underestimate the value of conversation.

Even if something turns out to be “not for you,” the research, the conversation, or the new perspective becomes a file in your internal “filing cabinet.” It’s yours to draw from, maybe not now, but later, when it matters most. And sometimes, that information can help someone else.

The Takeaway: Growth Is an Ongoing Practice

The world will keep moving, with or without us. Maintaining relevance doesn’t mean becoming someone new, it means evolving from who you are. It’s about choosing growth over stagnation and curiosity over comfort.

If you’re building a life aligned with your purpose and values (like we’ve discussed in posts like “The True Compass” and “The Pause That Powers Progress”), then staying current is just another way of honoring that commitment to yourself.

You don’t need to know it all.
You just need to stay open to learning.

💡 So, what will you learn this month that future-you will be thankful for?

Alignment as a Path to Achievement: The Power of Knowing Your Why

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🌿 Finding Your Why

At some point, we all hit moments when life or work feels heavier than we can handle. The goals blur, the motivation fades, and we start to question why we’re even doing it all.

That’s when understanding your why becomes your anchor.

In both career and life coaching, I often talk about the difference between achievement and alignment. You can achieve all kinds of things — promotions, awards, milestones — but without alignment to your purpose, they can feel hollow.

Alignment is what connects achievement to meaning.

🧭 When Life Feels Off Course

When things get difficult, the resilience to sustain previously achieved success often comes down to what we believe in.

We all have a choice: we can adopt the “woe is me” mindset — decorate the space down there, stay stuck, and wonder why the world keeps coming at us — or we can accept that life isn’t always fair and focus instead on what still matters.

That’s where purpose and values come in.

💼 A Career Example

There have been moments in my career when I’ve worked for difficult leaders — situations that tested my patience and almost pushed me to quit. I came close more than once.

But here’s the thing: when people ask me what I do for a living, I don’t tell them I work for a toxic leader. I tell them the foundational truth — I help make it easier and safer for people to use their money.

That’s my why.

My passion is helping others. My purpose is creating systems that make life simpler and safer for others. My mission is the series of small goals that get me there.

The rest? That’s just noise.

❤️ A Personal Example

The same is true in life. I’ve faced loss and tragedy that left me breathless. There were times when I had to sit in the pain — to cry, to grieve, to feel the anger and doubt. That’s part of being human.

But after those moments, I remind myself of a simple truth: I have one life, and I don’t know how long it will be. So I better get living.

Being focused on your passion and purpose doesn’t shield you from bad things happening — it just means you understand yourself well enough to find your way through.

🪞 Knowing Your Values

If you’re not sure where to start, an easy way to begin understanding your why is through your values.

Here’s a simple exercise I recommend:

  1. Visit this list of values: Berkeley Wellbeing Printable List of Values
  2. Take 5 minutes to scan through the list and write down every word that jumps out at you. Don’t overthink it.
  3. Then, narrow your list down to your top 15 — the ones that feel most important to you.

Those values are your foundation.

Once you know them, you’ll start to notice patterns: what feels right, what feels off, what fills your energy, and what drains it. When something frustrates or excites you, it’s often because it’s brushing up against one of your values — for better or for worse.

Having that awareness helps you make better decisions and understand your reactions.

🌱 Alignment as the Path to Achievement

Everyone’s version of wealth, success, and achievement looks different.

For one person, success might mean climbing the corporate ladder. For another, it’s having the freedom to spend afternoons with family or creating something that helps others.

When your mission, passion, and purpose are aligned with your values, you’ll find achievement that actually feels fulfilling. And when life gets hard — because it will — that alignment gives you resilience to sustain your success.

✨ Final Thought

Knowing your why doesn’t mean life becomes easy. It means you have a compass when it gets hard.

Alignment leads to achievement, not the other way around.

So take time to reflect, rediscover what drives you, and make sure your next steps lead you closer to who you truly are. Because authenticity isn’t something we find once — it’s something we live, refine, and return to every single day.

The Hidden Power of Reflection: Looking Back to Move Forward

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🍂 Why Reflection Matters

In life and career coaching, we often encourage clients to look forward—not backward. Therapy is where the past is unpacked, while coaching is focused on building the future. And yet, I believe there’s a place for reflection.

Not the kind of reflection that traps us in regret, but the kind that gives us gratitude for what we’ve accomplished and perspective on how far we’ve come. Sometimes reflection is simply the gentle nudge we need to refocus on the things we wanted to do but drifted from along the way.

As fall settles in and the year begins to wind down, this is where reflection becomes powerful: it’s the bridge between progress made and progress still unfolding.

🗂 The Filing Cabinet of Our Experiences

I like to imagine each year as another drawer in our personal filing cabinet. Throughout the months, we add files labeled with moments: the risks we took, the challenges we overcame, the opportunities we embraced, and the lessons we learned.

Some files are thin, others thick. Some are filled with joy, others with difficulty. But together, they shape the foundation we stand on as we prepare for a new season.

Reflection helps us open that drawer and sort through it—not to dwell on mistakes, but to acknowledge growth. To say: “Look at what I’ve built. Look at how far I’ve come.”

🌱 Reflection with Gratitude

Reflection works best when framed with gratitude. Instead of focusing on the goals we didn’t quite meet, we can celebrate the progress we did make:

  • The times we showed up even when it was hard.
  • The small choices that aligned us with our bigger goals.
  • The resilience we found when life threw us unexpected challenges.

Gratitude reframes our past months as progress, not perfection. It reminds us that every choice—whether it felt successful or not—added depth to our awareness and resilience.

🧭 Nudges to Refocus

Reflection also serves as a gentle compass. When we revisit our drawer from the past year, we might notice files we meant to fill but didn’t. Not as failures, but as reminders.

  • Did you want to take a class and never enrolled?
  • Did you plan to set more boundaries but slipped back into old habits?
  • Did you long to travel, connect, or create but let busyness take the lead?

These aren’t negatives. They’re signposts. Nudges inviting us to bring them forward into the months ahead with renewed intention.

✨ Every Moment a Choice

The most beautiful truth about reflection is this: every moment is still a choice.

We can’t decide which moments will be perfect and which will be tragic, but we can decide how we respond. We can let devastating losses remain losses, or we can let them become transformations—the caterpillar into the butterfly, the seed into the tree.

Reflection helps us see that transformation in action. It shows us how yesterday’s choices built today’s awareness, and how today’s awareness can guide tomorrow’s growth.

🌟 As the Year Winds Down

As the leaves change and the pace of the year shifts, take a moment to pause and open your filing cabinet. Celebrate the progress inside. Give thanks for the experiences that added depth, resilience, and awareness.

And if you find files you meant to start but didn’t? Carry them forward—not as burdens, but as opportunities.

Because reflection isn’t about looking back with regret. It’s about looking back with gratitude, so you can move forward with clarity, intention, and hope.

SMART Goals, Smarter Reviews: Showing Up for Yourself at Year-End

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🎯 The Season of Reviews

It’s that time of year again: performance reviews, ratings, and raise decisions. For many organizations, this process drives not only salary increases but also reputation and career momentum.

Whether your company formally uses SMART goals (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound) or not, keeping this framework in mind when writing your self-review can set you apart from peers—and sometimes make a real difference in how you’re evaluated.

📌 Why SMART Goals Matter

SMART goals do more than check boxes. They:

  • Clarify what you actually did (Specific).
  • Show impact with data (Measurable).
  • Demonstrate focus and intentionality (Achievable).
  • Tie your work to the bigger picture (Relevant).
  • Show you respected deadlines (Time-bound).

Even if you didn’t achieve every outcome (and let’s face it, sometimes team goals don’t fully land), being specific about what you contributed can prove you exceeded expectations in your role.

🧠 The Reality of Ratings

Here’s the tough part: in many organizations, ratings fall into a bell curve. Even if your whole team is full of rockstars, someone may end up with “does not meet” if leaders don’t advocate strongly enough.

And let’s be honest—it isn’t always fair. Some people coast all year but write brilliant reviews that make them sound like high performers. Meanwhile, those who did the work but didn’t document it thoroughly risk getting overlooked.

That’s why being intentional about the details matters.

📖 My Own Example

I once received a set of goals from my organization that didn’t match the work I was actually doing. Instead of checking the box “not applicable,” I reframed my review. I tied my work back to the underlying purpose of those goals, explaining how my efforts enabled others to meet their targets.

Because I aligned my review with the company’s broader objectives, I earned a stronger performance rating than I would have otherwise.

It wasn’t about stretching the truth. It was about demonstrating relevance.

✅ How to Write a Smarter Review

Here are a few ways to apply SMART thinking to your own year-end review:

  1. Be Specific – Describe what you did, not just what the team accomplished.
  2. Make it Measurable – Use numbers, percentages, timelines, or deliverables.
  3. Show Achievability – Demonstrate how you tackled challenges with available resources.
  4. Stay Relevant – Connect your work to company values, strategy, and team goals.
  5. Respect Time Boundaries – Highlight deadlines met or how your timing helped others succeed.

🧷 Don’t Forget Your Network

Sometimes, pulling the details together isn’t easy. Don’t hesitate to lean on your network—trusted colleagues or mentors can help you remember contributions you may have overlooked.

And one more tip: don’t wait until the last minute. Systems go down, memories fade, and rushing can cost you the clarity your review deserves.

🌱 Final Thought

Your year-end review is another chance to show up for yourself. Not in a flashy, inflated way—but in a clear, accountable way that reflects your true impact.

You’ve already put in the work. Take the time to make it visible.

Because in the end, your reputation is built not only on what you do—but on how you choose to share it.

The Filing Cabinet of Life: Experience Fuels our Foundation

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There’s a simple truth I keep coming back to: every moment is a choice.

We don’t get to decide which moments will be perfect and which will be tragic. Life has a way of handing us both; sometimes in the same week, sometimes in the same breath. What we do get to decide though, is how those moments shape us. Our choices can turn devastating losses into surprising gifts. They turn the caterpillar into the butterfly. Every experience shapes who we are becoming and what foundation we stand on tomorrow.

I’ve started thinking of it like a filing cabinet of Life. Every experience, every decision, every conversation that we open ourselves to gets filed away. Not all files are easy to keep. Some are thick with heartbreak, others are filled with joy, and many are somewhere in between. All together, they give us depth.

And that depth matters.

Depth Builds Connection

The more drawers we fill, the more room we have for empathy, understanding, and grace. When we’ve faced our own obstacles, we are less quick to judge someone else for theirs. When we’ve taken risks – some that worked out and some that didn’t – we become more patient with those who are still deciding if they’ll leap.

This is why I believe our True Compass is rooted in experience. It’s not just values written on paper or abstract ideas about who we want to be. It’s the real, lived filing cabinet of our choices that shapes how we show up. It’s what makes us someone others can trust, lean on, and follow.

Awareness Comes Through Experience

Awareness doesn’t just appear one day. It’s cultivated, file by file, experience by experience. When we open ourselves up and stop limiting what we allow in, to become more vulnerable; we start to see differently. To think differently. Those shifts ripple into every future decision.

That’s why the small daily choices matter so much. The “micro” actions of taking a class, saying yes to a trip, or daring to try something new… even if it doesn’t work out the way we imagined, it adds a new layer of awareness. Over time, those small choices add up to profound change.

Manifesting Through Alignment

Some people call it coincidence. I’ve come to believe it’s alignment. When we consistently file away moments that align with who we want to be — choosing kindness, accountability, resilience, curiosity — we start to notice opportunities that match. It’s like the physical world bends slightly toward the thoughts and goals we’ve been cultivating.

No, we can’t script life into perfection. But by being intentional, we can create more moments of joy, connection, and meaning.

What Are You Filling Your Cabinet With?

At the end of the day, the question isn’t whether life will hand you easy moments or difficult ones. It will hand you both. The real question is:

What are you choosing to file away?

Are you collecting experiences that expand your foundation, deepen your awareness, and build your resilience? Are you choosing to see risk as a teacher and presence as a gift?

One of the most beautiful things about life is that every moment is a choice, and every choice is a chance to become something new.

Closing Thought

Take the class. Take the trip. Take the chance. Even if it doesn’t go perfectly, the lessons you learn may one day be the very foundation you lean on — or the story you tell that inspires someone else’s story. Your filing cabinet is waiting. What will you fill it with?

The Pause That Powers Progress

Photo by Jordan Benton: https://www.pexels.com/photo/shallow-focus-of-clear-hourglass-1095601/

🌿 Rethinking “Busy”

We live in a world that glorifies the grind. The constant hum of emails, notifications, pings, and “just one more” meeting invite can make it feel like being busy is the same thing as being productive.

It’s not.

Productivity is about meaningful output. Busy is about activity—sometimes just for the sake of appearing active.

The truth? Growth happens in the space between. Those moments when you step away, breathe, and let your mind and body recalibrate are not “breaks from the work.” They are part of the work.

🕰 The Email at 7:30 PM

Ever seen a coworker or manager sending emails or trying to schedule meetings at odd, non-business hours? That pull you feel to respond instantly isn’t really about the message—it’s about presence.

But “being present” doesn’t mean mirroring someone else’s work habits.

Here’s the difference:

  • The Parent: Maybe they had to step away between 2–4 p.m. for school pickup, homework, or dinner prep. Now they’re catching up after bedtime. They don’t expect an immediate reply because they respect that their schedule is unique to them.
  • The Workaholic or the Disorganized: They expect others to keep their pace, regardless of boundaries or balance.

The truth is, what matters most is not matching someone else’s timing—it’s consistently meeting your role’s expectations during your own work hours.

Yes, there will be times when after-hours work is necessary for an emergency or special project, but it shouldn’t be the norm. Continual overextension is a recipe for burnout.

🛑 Intentional Pauses Are a Strategy

When we talk about “pausing,” it’s easy to think of rest as doing nothing. But intentional pauses are active choices to recharge so you can stay appropriately productive—not just perpetually busy.

Here are a few ways I’ve made rest part of my growth plan:

1. Micro-Breaks Between Meetings

I’ll step outside and take a 5–7 minute walk around the block or parking lot. It’s my modern version of the old-fashioned smoke break. Fresh air, a change of scenery, and a moment to let my mind wander make all the difference, and its better for your lungs!

2. Protecting My Hobbies

I love volleyball and paddleboarding, so I make sure I’m playing volleyball at least 1–2 times a week or getting my paddleboard out on the lake. Even short moments outdoors can reset your mind and improve your resilience.

3. Separating Work from Play

During the pandemic, I worked from a loft in my home, and it felt like I never stopped. The second I heard an email ding, I was back upstairs answering it. That’s when I made a rule: Put a pin in it.

I even made a little board for my monitor that read “Closed for Business.” At the end of the day, I’d jot my priorities in OneNote, put the board up, and walk away. It gave my brain permission to disconnect.

⚖️ Respect Boundaries—Yours and Theirs

Everyone works differently. Some tasks take one person an hour and another person two, and that’s okay. The key is not expecting others to match your schedule—or feeling pressured to match theirs.

Respecting time boundaries isn’t a sign of laziness; it’s a sign of sustainable productivity.

🌱 Final Thought

Rest, recharge, and recovery aren’t indulgences. They are the quiet fuel behind meaningful work, creative problem-solving, and resilience in a world that doesn’t slow down on its own.

If you want to power your progress, start by learning to pause—intentionally, unapologetically, and often.